It was July 7, 2013 (a Sunday) at around 5:00pm that I started to feel some cramps. Dust and I were watching Back to the Future when I mentioned to him that I was feeling some pain down below. Up to this point in my pregnancy I had never really felt any pain or contractions. Baby boy was due July 29, so I didn't think that going into labor was even an option at this point. haha Like you can choose. I would casually tell Dust when the pain would come and go. I decided that I should google "false labor" to see if that was what was going on. I assured myself that this was the case. Bedtime rolled around and as I was laying there about to fall asleep I started to feel this pain again. About every 15 minutes it would come back and it started to get pretty painful.
It was about 11:00pm at this point and Dust was sound asleep. I tried the fetal position to help dull the pain, didn't work. I tried curling up on the floor like a rock, didn't work. I made my way into the living room because I didn't want to disturb my sweetly, peaceful sleeping husband who had to work in the morning. So I suffered alone. In the living room. Crying here and there when the pain would come. I remember telling myself that if this was false labor I was DEFINITELY getting the epidural because I didn't even want to know what real labor would feel like. Previously, I had been going back and forth between natural childbirth and getting medicine, but at that moment I convinced myself that the day I "actually" went into labor I would get the meds. Little did I know what was about to go down in just a few hours. Dun. Dun. Dun.
At around 1:00am I remembered that my doctor had said that I should go to the hospital if my contractions were coming every 5 minutes for 2 hours. I started to keep track of the time of the contractions on a sticky note. Sure enough they just kept coming. Some 3 minutes apart, some 1 minute, some 2 minutes etc. I waited until exactly 3:00am (didn't want to not follow doctors orders haha) before I hesitantly decided to wake up Dustin. It went something like this...
Me: *Gently taps shoulder* "um, Dustin I think we might need to go to the hospital."
Dust: *slowly waking up* "What?"
Me: "The doctor said we should go if contractions come every 5 minutes for 2 hours, and they have been."
Dust: "Well, you seem fine."
Me: "Just wait until the next contraction hits." haha
Dust: "okay I will get up." *Slowly proceeds to put on some clothes, brush his teeth, put in contact, make a gourmet breakfast, brush his hair, watch a football game, etc* (this is what it felt like to me haha)
At 3:40am, (it took my sweet husband that long people) we got into the car. We debated whether we should bring the car seat that had just arrived the previous Wednesday. We decided to bring it just in case. (We were so ridiculous) We drove to the hospital in good old Logan, Utah. When we got there we realized that neither of us knew where to go. Dustin decided to see if he could find an open door while I waited in the car. He found one. We parked and walked to the entrance. There was a custodian there and she looked at us and said, "you aren't supposed to come in this door, these doors are normally locked. I only have them open for cleaning."
At this point my contractions were becoming even more painful. I was walking with a bit of a limp and occasionally had to stop to ease the pain. I was thinking you have got to be kidding me. Luckily, we told her the situation and she led us through the hospital to labor and delivery. We went to check in and I remember thinking, oh man they have to go to all this work to check us in and I am probably not even in labor! They are giving me a wristband and everything. How embarrassing if this is false labor!
They took us to a room and had me change into a robe. Contractions were more painful. I told the nurse that I wasn't even sure I was in labor and that I was sorry for the inconvenience. She casually put on her gloves and checked me. I was dilated to a 5/6 and clearly in labor. She started to move a lot more quickly after that point. Ha! I remember thinking, oh my goodness this is it. We don't even have a name ready! She asked if I wanted the epidural and I said yes without a moments hesitation. The pain was getting worse. I must tell you that I am TERRIFIED of needles, but the fear of the next contraction outweighed my fear of the needle by a long shot. (punny) The anesthesiologist gave me the epidural and I didn't even feel a thing. Sweet monkey!
It was now about 5:00am and the doctor said the numbing should kick in in about 10 minutes. I kept watching the clock, 10 minutes went by, then 20 minutes. The pain was still there and it was not getting better. With each contraction I remember grabbing poor Dustin's hand and telling him to say nice things to me. haha You see he isn't the best in stressful situations and I was kind of a mess. I kept thinking that I probably looked like a person suffering from the Cruciatus curse in Harry Potter. My poor husband.
My water still had not broke at this point so the doctor broke it for me. I didn't think it was possible, but the contractions started hurting more and more and coming more quickly! They were surprised that I was still feeling everything and called the anesthesiologist back in. I was now dilated to a 9 and he told me that he could give me another shot but wasn't sure the medicine would even take in time before I had to start pushing. I had no idea what I should do, so we decided to give the epidural another shot (punz for dayz peeps). After about 10 minutes I started to feel sweet sweet relief! Oh my stars, it was like angels started singing and I was running through fields of daisies! Modern medicine for the win!
It was now about 7:00am on July 8. My doctor was out of town, so I had to use whichever doctor was on call. Dr. Blackett was the one who broke my water, but her shift was up. They decided to wait until I had progressed a little further before calling in Dr. Fowers. The nurse was super nice and was stretching out "that area" to prevent tears from the big event. She had me pushing with each contraction. It was soooooo nice not feeling pain! I could feel pressure, but I was in a much calmer state and much more pleasant to be around. (Dust will attest to that) I am so glad that I was able to have the medicine so that I could more fully appreciate the miracle that was taking place. I felt at peace and not nervous or fearful at all. Everyone is so different when it comes to opinions on labor, but this was perfect for me. :)
The nurse had me push until I started crowning, she told me that she could see a lot of dark hair. I started crying at this point. Tears of joy. This was my little boy. He was sent to me from heaven and it just became a lot more real. When the doctor arrived I only had to give two more pushes and our sweet baby came! He was born at 8:06 am, 6 lbs. 6 oz (which Dustin says is a false weight because they weighed him wet haha) and 18.5 inches long (I think the height was probably off that seems super short) oh well.
Dustin ended up cutting the umbilical cord which he swore on his life he was not going to do. He refused to look or walk anywhere past my waist during the labor, so I was quite surprised that he ended up doing the honors. Silly boy. They put my sweet baby on my chest right after that. He was still covered in all that fun birth stuff and please forgive me, but I remember thinking that he looked disgusting and they should probably bring him to me after they clean him off. Whoops! I still loved him though! haha
I actually remember crying a lot as soon as I heard his cry for the first time. I had heard lots of stories about moms feeling this overwhelming feeling of love for their baby the first time they saw them. I just remember feeling ALL sorts of emotions rolled into one. Love. Fear. Joy. Overwhelmed. Exhaustion. Inadequacy. Happiness. Responsibility. Relief.
I will never forget those feelings. They grow stronger the more I am with my amazing baby boy. That first day of his precious little life was unforgettable. Seeing my husband become a father was indescribable. I couldn't believe how much more love I felt for him in that moment as well. Seeing him hold our baby boy really tugged at my heart strings. For me the divinity of the family became more real in that moment. Father, mother, child. It was such a beautiful moment and I hope to experience it again someday. I am truly grateful to my Heavenly Father for trusting me with His precious child. I feel honored and blessed and hope that I never take it for granted.
